It is not important that both partners climax at the same time or from similar activities. What is important is that both partners climax from whatever works for them. For example, a woman might climax through penetration while a man might climax through something else. Well, their duty is to make each other climax separately rather than the man insisting that he will only have THIS and the woman insisting that she will only have THAT.  

No one, particularly men, likes to be told that she or he is not performing: they consider it as a direct attack on their personality and get offended and defensive, making it even worse. I consider discovering each other's sexual preferences similar to discovering each other's tastes in food or music or types of vacations. Never assume anything. Not all guys like beer, pizza, and comfortable sofas. You have to gradually ask the right questions and get the answers. Similarly, you have to give hints to your partner so that he learns about you. (Attention Men:  If you are reading this: Learn to ask questions and again be subtle about them since most women are very shy to talk what they like in the bedroom).   

So what can these ladies do?

Since a man does not really know what pleases a woman, a woman has to tell him what works for her. It is possible to do so without sounding bossy or challenging his manhood. And a man who does not want to listen is probably not worth being your boyfriend or husband. So tell him exactly what works for you and how he should do it.  Be subtle in your approach. Be like a guide rather than a drill sergeant (Britney Spears in bed). Sometimes women do not like to approach this topic directly and this is perfectly understandable.  (Related:  How to make a woman hot)

We all have our personal preferences. If you like something then you have to find a way to communicate it to your partner. For instance, you can rent an adult movie (Porn addiction) that you like and when the right scene comes, you should point out that you would like to try it with him. Even if you have done it a million times before, you should still take the "Let's try it" approach rather than telling him what to do. Then it becomes an adventure for both of you.  (Related: Britney Spears fantasy room)

Learn to give hints. Most men are pretty smart to get those hints. Here is one trick that worked for my client. She really wanted oral from her husband but it just did not happen for years. She was too shy to tell him and he was clueless if she wanted it. So I suggested that she stock her lingerie drawer with a couple of thongs and panties.  Then I suggested that they take a couple of days off to go on a short romantic weekend trip. Of course, she brought her new collection with her. The very first night when he undressed her and saw the beautiful underwear, he was mesmerized with it and played with it for the longest time. It did not take him long to do what she wanted. And the four nights that they were together they had a great time. Since then he has discovered the joy of doing it and she has figured out what it takes to attract a man's attention without saying a word.

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Romantic getaways for couples   Partner pleasure       Confront your partner   First time sex